1 Month!

Same day last month, Pebble was frightened by the fire crackers and ran away. I have not seen her thereafter. Today, we went back to the estate again just to take a look. I wonder if I will ever see her again. If I don't, I hope she is happy and warm. She will always be in our hearts and always be my dearest baby.

Pebble, Mummy miss you!

Dealing With Lost

The following question keeps coming to my mind after I lost Pebble. Is dealing with death easier than dealing with a lost that has a possibility of being recovered? Pebble is my first lost in my life. It has not been easy dealing with this sudden lost. The first week was terrible. There were a lot of sadness, heartaches, pains and tears. I wanted her back so badly. Then it was the phase of coming to terms with the harsh reality that I might never find her back. Just when you thought you were in more control with your emotions, phone calls of Pebble sightings rekindled the hope. And since then, it was a period of trying to get your life back, managing disappointment and cautiously dealing with new leads. There are many emotional upheavals in this phase and you wonder when will everything be normal again? When to give up and should we ever give up? What else can we do if we don't? Maybe in this sense, dealing with death is easier? I don't know...really don't.

Coming face to face with the pet sitter!!!

We decided to arrange a session to settle all the issues with the pet sitter once and for all. We had 4 Russians to help us with the questioning; Adrian's interpreter, driver, a friend and his driver. When the pet sitter came, he looked worried and shock that there were so many people around. The Russians gave him a hard time. A friend asked what did I hope to achieve out of this session. I guess firstly, we wanted to have a full picture of how he lost Pebble and what did he do during those few days before we came back. Secondly, we wanted to affirm how he felt after he lost Pebble; was he sorry, guilty etc or simply, too bad, she ran away. Thirdly, we wanted a closure to the episode that we have with him.

I guess at the end of the session, these are our conclusions:
a) he unleased Pebble for no good reason,
b) he did little to recover her,
c) he felt nothing for the lost,
d) he is an irresponsble and stupid chap. Even the Russians who were present could not understand his stupidity and indifference.

An Update

Today is the start of the working week after a very long public holiday (lasted a week). Adrian, his colleague, our driver and I went back to the estate to see if we had any luck with the schools. Sad to say, the school will be closed until 15 Jan, but the security guard assured us that they were aware of Pebble's disappearance; apparently, it had became the talk of the town. They were on the look out for her as they took such cases very seriously (Russians are dog lovers). Adrian's colleague has also been helping us keep tabs on those websites listing sales of dogs and lost and found.

We also placed press ads in the local newspaper as well as the one for Moscow, and bought a 1-week TV ad in the region where she was lost. Now, all we can do is wait and hope that someone will see the ads and bring Pebble back to us.

To my friends: Don't worry, Adrian and I will manage. See you back in Singapore on 7 Feb.

The 10th Day!

Today marks the 10th day of Pebble's disappearance. Adrian and I decided to take a break from the search and do some administrative things like reprinting her flyers, replenishing tubes of glue and scotch tape, and wash the car. Many things seem not in place in her absence. There was no one to chase after the vacuum cleaner when I was vacuuming the house, no shit to clean in the toilet, no one to squeeze underneath the bed and many many more. There are many many memories of her in the house...every corner reminds you of her absence.

To Pebble

I am sorry that mummy entrusted you to a wrong care taker such that you were separated from us. It will be a decision for which mummy will never forgive herself. But mummy and daddy will continue to look for you...we will never give up on you.

To All My Friends.....

Thank you Line and Ngiam for getting me a good "qian" and I am patiently waiting for the lost to be recovered.
Thank you Jenny and Fang for checking on me.
Thank you Liang for lightening up the atmosphere for everybody.
Thank you Weiling for sending me the link to the online "qiu qian" mechanism
Thank you all for feeling the pain with me and giving the support.

In case you are wondering what we have gathered about Pebble so far:
28 Dec (1 day after she ran away) - spotted in the kindergarten looking hungry: this really breaks my heart cos Pebble was never, ever being left hungry. It breaks my heart also she is so near where she ran off and the pet sitter didn't even bother to look for her.
30 Dec - spotted in another school being chase by another dog to a construction site at noon.
30 Dec - spotted walking towards a very long and uninhabited road.

After our analysis, our hope is that she ran into the kindergarten looking for food and she was picked up by someone in the school hence nobody in the neighbourhood saw her thereafter. As for the 2nd and 3rd sighting, the white dog is not her. There are many white dogs around the area indicated. Maybe this is self-denial but I really don't understand why nobody sees her if she is still straying around.

On the eve of the New Year, I lost Pebble :(

Can someone tell me where she is, how she is, what she is doing, when can she come home? I don't know what to do without Pebble. I called my heart out to her but nothing came back. Pebble...come home...Mummy is waiting for you!