Pregnancy Blues

I thought my first post about my pregnancy would be something exciting and happy. Unfortunately, there will be a patch of dark cloud hovering over the sky of this post. There were plans to put up scan photos and to detail each milestone. But things came to a halt before I can even start.

I took my Oscar about a week ago and the result turned out to be 1:235 (high risk category). Upon further examination of the report, my baby seems to be having a higher than normal nuchal transparency (NT) reading. An amnio test was recommended. I started reading up about NT and the results of the Oscar. It is a very frustrating process as different medical reports would give you different conclusions or no conclusion. Some were things that assured you while others were information that put you in an uneasy situation.

Staying positive at this juncture is the most important and perhaps most difficult. Turning to faith seems to have a calming effect. At service on Sunday, the message was to trust and have faith. A random reading of today's Bible verse is also about having faith. I trust my chances are good as the odds are relatively low and I will put my faith on Him to guide me through this process and what comes thereafter. I hope I can start detailing my pregnancy soon. 2 more weeks. Chin up!

Uncluttering my thoughts

I has been a while since I last updated my blog. Strangely for this post, I don't know where to begin, how to structure .....But it doesn't matter. The aim is to unclutter some thoughts. Someone told me recently that when a door is shut on you, there are always others that will open. Options. I woke up one morning, having a very strong conviction to break out of my current life. Not that it is not good enough, it's just a feeling of being shortchanged. While there is this strong conviction, a voice murmurs within me, "Stop being so self-centred. Think about those around you. You have a responsibility with them too."

Anyhow, I was overcome by that conviction and suddenly everything seems so calm and clear. Opportunities start to present itself. My only confusion now is, "What do I want?". Yes, another "Me" statement. I don't know. I am just blown away by that conviction, by the opportunities that presented itself thereafter.

Searching within, the only visual that keeps appearing is, "Do something meaningful, do something you like." Shall let this guide me to wherever I shall be next.